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A Trip to Bountiful: Five Guys' Quest for Barbecue This is our report to the members of the Gastronomic Appreciation Society, without whom our barbecue quest might have been long and circuitous.Dear Rick and our other GASeous friends: We know you'll be surprised to hear this, but you are worshiped as a minor deity by five strangers from afar. By "you," of course, we mean your Web site. And, as homage to your extensive research, we're pleased to offer this far-too-lengthy account of five out-of-towners and their recent journey for good Kansas City barbecue. Please feel free to post our intrepid report on your site. It turns out, the primary reason to go to Kansas City is because it is the closest airport to Lee's Summit, Mo. That's where we found the single greatest intersection in all of America — at Douglas and Third. On one corner, Dairy Queen. On the other, The Filling Station Bar-B-Q Restaurant. Mama, forward the mail, we're not comin' home! So here's the testimonial (feel free to use this quote on your site): We found heaven because of the GAS Web site. Maybe we should explain who "we" are. We are a group of fools who have, for the most part, grown up together or lived together or otherwise come to enjoy each other's company in and around Florida. Now we are scattered across the Southeast in Charlotte, Miami, Tampa, Atlanta and Montgomery, Ala. Two years ago, looking for an excuse to get away from our wives, our girlfriends or both, we formed an annual guys-only weekend to discuss questionable business ideas, make bad jokes and eat good food. For reasons not worth explaining, we call it "The Summit of Love". After Atlanta in 1998 and Melbourne, Fla., in 1999, we chose Kansas City as our meeting place for 2000, because it offered barbecue, baseball and an REO Speedwagon/Styx concert all in one weekend, June 9-11. Also, we are rib people. We don't care about sandwiches, or pulled pork, or eastern Carolina slop. We want ribs. So we all studied your Web site and used it as our only source for the BBQ portions of our trip. FRIDAY, JUNE 9 We arrived in town around lunch time, and our first stop was Gates on Main Street (downtown) because it was near the hotel. It smelled great from the parking lot. And those waitresses hollering, "Whattayahave?" — do they get special "annoying voice" training or something? Anyway, Gates got mixed reviews. Service was slow. Slaw was spicy. Beans were tasty, though. We all had ribs and we rated them average. They were a little dry. Only one of us appreciated the white bread under the meat. After the Friday night Royals game, we looked desperately for a late-night BBQ joint to sample. We found only Gates was open. Our belief is that a true major-league city would have several midnight barbecue options available. Please work with the convention and visitors association to draft legislation that will rectify this sub-human state of affairs.  SATURDAY, JUNE 10We all agreed your description of The Filling Station made it the stop for lunch. But we were unprepared for the lovely site of a Dairy Queen on the adjacent corner. Barbecue and ice cream? Heck, that's both the food groups in one place. (One of us actually moistened his pants in ecstasy.) We were quite hungry when we got out of the van, and the powerful scent of barbecue only made us hungrier. This place looks great — tremendous job on the decorating — and the 1950s Muzak soundtrack is real barbecue eating stuff. We were happy just to be on the property. Although there were only five of us, we filled up the dining area of The Filling Station quite well. (Our smallest guy is 6-foot-3, 190 pounds.) We ordered two huge combo plates and slab of ribs. As we fumbled for the cash, owner Larry Bender said, "You fellas aren't from around here, are you?" When we rattled off our hometowns, he gasped, "How in the hell did you find Lee's Summit, Missouri?" That's when we gave GAS all the credit. Larry remembered you fondly, and he clearly appreciated the significant economic impact we were about to make on his bottom line that day. 
Service was excellent. It was quick and we even got pickles. The "Supertest" sauce was a hit. It seemed to have a delayed kick. You eat a rib with the sauce, wait two minutes, and then start sweating. Even so, the ribs were perfect without sauce — juicy with an excellent crust. The chicken deserves special mention, too. It was moist with good smoke flavor.Actually, everything had a good smoke flavor. Including our clothes, which still smelled of barbecue smoke 12 hours later. It was like going to a bar and coming home with cigarette smoke in your shirt. Except we smelled like smoked meats — and, frankly, what could be finer? We enjoyed the ribs and chicken and sausage and turkey and pork. On rare occasions, we have eaten meat that was equal to the taste challenge. But we've never had beans like that. Larry lets everything he cooks drip into that stuff, and — wow! It's like eating mouthfuls of sweet smoke. By far, the finest any of us had ever tasted. As the meat disappeared, one of us declared he wanted more. "It's not coming out of my ears yet, so I'm not full," he said. A U.S. postman came by to get lunch, so another member of our group asked for a change-of-address form. "I'm moving in and I want my wife to forward my mail," he explained. The last of the meat slipped into our gastrointestinal tracts when Larry, who definitely can smell money through the smoke, began touting the hot fruit pies. We briefly debated whether we could eat pie AND go to Dairy Queen. Larry tipped the scales when he asked if we wanted to pie a la mode. (We did.) Saturday night, after the concert (how Styx can justify not playing "Mr. Roboto" is beyond us), we again ran into the problem of no late-night barbecue availability. We cannot stress enough the importance of getting that fixed. SUNDAY, JUNE 11 We had a Royals afternoon game and flights to catch. We desperately wanted to try L.C.'s, but it was closed. It looks tremendous — the way a great barbecue place ought to look. We believe it's a good sign when you can't tell where the tire yard ends and the restaurant begins. Someday, when we return to Kansas City, L.C's will be our second stop. Right after we visit Lee's Summit. All in all, it was a successful trip to the Kansas City metropolitan area. We appreciate the ample background everyone there at GAS provided, and we bless the founders of the Internet for making such research readily available. This rib's for you.
P.S.: If you're ever in Tampa, we suggest Kojak's House of Ribs. (You'll probably find one of us already there.) [Back to archives] |